Small Town Livin'

Small town livin'....
Today I did something that I have NEVER done before. I went to the store without my makeup on. Now, I know to some women that is as natural as can be, but to me....I might as well have been butt naked! It's not a pretty picture. Scary. I simply went to Homers to pick up some chicken for our dinner. When I pulled up into the parking lot there wasn't a car in sight. Yes! I put my sunglasses on my head just in case they were needed. All went well until the checkout. Three customers walked in. I whipped those glasses on in record speed! All three were people that in normal circumstances, I would have stopped to chat with. But, in my current state all I did was mumble "Hey there" as they all said "HELLO DESIREE" to me. And out the door I flew. Now believe me, my ears were burning all the way home. I can just hear it...."Did you see Desiree? What's up with those glasses? I wonder if she was hungover? Maybe Tim made her cry and her eyes were all red. Was her nose red? I didn't see it. She wouldn't turn around. Why wouldn't she turn around? Maybe she got bad news. Have you heard anything? Is Nancy in town? I bet they went out and tied one on. Yeah, she was probably hung over...."  I guess I won't know what the final verdict is until someone tells me what they "heard." What can you do? That's small town livin' for ya.

Sweet Daddy

This is Landon and his cousin, Jack.

They are going to make great Dad's someday!!

Dryer Fairy

One of the perks about being the only person in the household talented enough to do laundry is, occasionally the dryer fairy leaves me money. I found $24.00 in there this morning! I told Tim and Landon I was taking them uptown for supper. I didn't tell them about the money until it came time to pay. I announced how happy I was because the dryer fairy left me $24.00.
Landon was so impressed! Tim... not so much.
That's the soaps sometimes. Ya just gotta roll with the towels.... :) :) :)

Laughter

Mark Twain said it best...

"The human race has only one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. The moment it arises, all your irritations and resentments slip away and the sunny spirit takes their place."

Popovers

Landon and I were watching

Melissa D'Arabian's show the other night.

She was making popovers.

Guess what we had to make for supper?

Don't they look great???

Alex

 

Tim, Landon, his cousin Katie and I

made a quick trip to Walmart in Alex yesterday.

We stopped at Burger King and the Mall

first for a little fun though!

Fire

Tim went to pick up Landon at his Mom and Dad's.

He found Landon and his Grandpa Laurel

 digging out the fire pit!

They actually got it out and made a fire.

Tim didn't get a picture of the fire, but Landon said it was great!

Oh, the memories he will have...

Bee House

Landon was bored and decided to make a bee house.

I think any bee would be happy in that house!

Tell Me All About It...

I have a small problem. You see, it seems there is a huge neon sign that hangs above my head. It follows me where ever I go, and it says in flashing lights: "TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT!" It doesn't matter where I am or what I am doing, someone always feels compelled to tell me things I do not need or want to know. I could be in Walmart looking for a nail clipper and someone will come up to me and start to tell me all about their toe nail fungus...blah, blah, blah. Really. I don't need to know. It doesn't just happen every now and then, it happens to me ALL THE TIME! Complete strangers tell me all about their personal stuff. I don't need to know that stuff! It's your stuff! I don't want your stuff! Keep it! Please! Today I had to go to the dentist. One of my fillings felt crazy and I had some pretty wild pain shooting up through my jaw. As I entered the clinic I did a quick scan of who was there. Luckily (I thought) only one woman was sitting there. Not feeling very sociable, I tried to sit as far away from her as I could and avoided eye contact. I had no more than crossed my legs when I heard from across the room.... "Boy I hope this storm passes us, blah, blah, blah, I just want the snow to melt, blah, blah, blah, I bought my house in March of 97 and that was the worst snow....blah, blah, blah....." For the love of Pete! Enough already.Now, my friends and families stuff? I love their stuff. I could talk to them for days about their stuff. Go ahead, tell me all about it. But, complete strangers....not so much. I would make a terrible therapist. After 5 minutes I would say, "Times up! I recommend you suck it up and move on. That will be $200 bucks. Pay at the door." Hmmm....maybe I need to hang out a shingle....

Masterpiece

Our Master's Masterpiece.

Click on the picture for a closer view.

Pot Roast

Really Good N' Easy Crock Pot

 Pot Roast And Gravy

1 Good Size Pot Roast

Get one that has a good amount of fat on it.

You can always cut it off and throw it away later.

The fat is what keeps your roast from drying out,

and also makes the gravy better.

3/4 Cup of Water

1 Packet of Dry Ranch Dressing

1 Packet of Dry Italian Dressing

1 Packet of Dry Brown Gravy Mix

Mix water and dry ingrediants and pour over roast.

Half way through cooking, flip the roast over and stir the gravy.

If it looks like it needs a little more water,

 (There should be at least a cup or more of liquid.)

you can add a little more.

Cook according to your crockpot book.

(I usually cook mine for at least 6-8 hours
 depending on the roast size)

When the roast is done, pour the gravy into a frying pan and bring to

a boil and add a little flour/water mixture,
like you would if you were making gravy from drippings.
(Place about 1/8 cup of flour and about 1 cup of water
 in a container with a lid. Shake container until mixture is smooth
without lumps. Slowly add to the gravy stirring constantly.
Let gravy continue to boil while doing this)
 Enjoy!

Selective Eating

I am a "selective"eater. Some would use the term "picky," but I like selective. I know what I like. When Tim and I started dating he kept calling me Sally. I didn't get it until he explained to me that Meg Ryan played a gal who was also a selective eater in the movie "When Harry Met Sally." I rented the movie and checked it out. I like Sally. I also like my chilli without beans and lots of cheese. No spoon, just tortilla chips for dipping. BLT's are great without the T and on white toast with real mayo and iceberg lettuce only. Iceberg lettuce is the only lettuce worth eating. All the others taste like grass and dirt. I like cheese on my pizza. Lots of it. Meat is alright in small amounts. I have to tell myself it's soybeans or something otherwise I can't get past the furry cute faces. Steak is alright sometimes, as long as it's WELL done. No moooooo please, and with A-1 steak sauce only. I like real butter only. I can't eat plastic molecules. The only vegtables that don't make me gag are potatoes, corn, raw carrots and iceberg lettuce. Fruit is pretty much bananas, melons, and oranges. The only pasta I like is spaghetti and lasagna. Don't even think about putting ricotta or cottage cheese in there either! Now, that's some nasty stuff. As you can see by my body type, all junk food is good! I only like my eggs scrambled or in an omlette stuffed with cheese. But not Velvetta or American. They are not cheese, they are plastic. I like my beer cold and on ice. But, don't give me a big heavy glass. I might chip my teeth. I only drink bottled water. Tap water makes me gag. Doesn't matter what town we are in. If the food has even the tiniest bit of off smell forget it. I also can't buy anything in the bargin bin. So, I guess you could say I am a Sally. Want to do lunch sometime?

Quotes

To The Girls!
Here are some of my favorite girl quotes.....


Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, totally worn out and screaming 'WOOO HOOOOO what a ride!'



Inside every older person is a younger person -- wondering what the hell happened.
- Cora Harvey Armstrong-


Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out, but I can usually shut her up with cookies.
(Unknown)


The hardest years in life are those between ten and seventy.
-Helen Hayes (at 73)-


Old age ain't no place for sissies.
-Bette Davis-


Thirty-five is when you finally get your head together and your body starts falling apart.
- Caryn Leschen -



If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
-Catherine-


I'm not going to vacuum until Sears makes one you can ride on.
- Roseanne Barr-


Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.
-Eleanor Roosevelt-

Dittys

Having a full time day care can be fun, and funny!
Here are a few little ditty's that my dc kids have shared with me....

"Know what? My daddy got new underwear."

When I asked one of my girls if she liked the color of my kitchen, (I had just painted it Hunter Green)
she said "Yes! It looks like a cool cave!" (I changed it back to yellow shortly after that!)

During a discussion of who was potty trained, one of my little boys said,
"My mommy and daddy are potty trained!"

One of our sayings around here when going to time out is, "If you can't do the time, don't do the crime." So, when one little boy had to go to time out, another one told him "If you can't do the rhyme, don't do the time!"

"When my mommy's hair gets black (roots) she just cuts (colors) it. You should try that."

"I don't have any wrinkles, but my daddy does!"

"Let's play house. You be the daddy and I'll be the boss."

Open Mind

"It's good to keep an open mind.
Just don't be so open minded that your brains fall out."

I can't remember who said that.
It must have fell out when I was being open minded.
Have a great day!!!! :) :) :)

Fresh Air

We finally had a nice enough day to get outside and enjoy the fresh air!

Spring is on it's way....Oh, yes it is!!

Bread Pudding

Bread Pudding Anyone?

Tim and Landon think this is to die for.

They pour cream over it and go to town.

Me? Not so much.

Soggy bread or Chocolate?

Chocolate, baby!

Dog House

Landon and Tim built Ole a little addition on his dog house...

Hmmm.....this could come in handy!

Up date

O.k. looking back at the last post, I thought I better make something clear. (Before you all email me about my parenting skills!) When Landon becomes a teen, I WILL NOT be encouraging him to drink or have sex. But, I am not so gullible that I will think that "my child" would never do those things. (Think back to your own teen years!) Those things happen. All the time. When they do, I will be prepared not shocked. I really don't know if that is how I will handle it, but it's fun to post and I like to make you laugh. So, play along and don't take all my posts too seriously. Life is short. Lighten up and laugh. It's cheap therapy. :)

The Difference Between Boys And Girls

I just received a call from a friend of mine who is going through a terrible time with her daughter. Her daughter wants to wear make up, shave her legs, date boys....you get the picture. The problem? She's seven. Yes! Seven! I thank the Good Lord everyday that I have a son. Here is my theory on girls. (I know these things because I just happen to be a girl) There is nothing cuter than a little girl, until she turns five that is. Then there is this huge hormonal shift and they turn into little sassy-major attitude darlings. Then every five years or so there is another huge hormonal shift and it's a whole 'nother set of problems. It continues on and on and never ends until you die. Now boys, they are so lucky. They get to be rough and rowdy when they are little because that is what boys do. It's expected and accepted. Girls sit still, look pretty and have nice tea partys. It's all those nice tea partys that build up and explode that get's the hormonal ball rolling. Rebellion. Boys go through one little hormonal surge when they are teens and one more later on. (It's called a midlife crisis, but I won't go into that!) So unfair. Now I am sorry to say I didn't have a clue what to say to help my friend and her daughter, but here is what I plan on telling my son when he reaches his terrible teens.

We have three rules in this house:

1.  CELL PHONE
At all times your cell phone will be charged and on you. You will answer that phone every single time I call you. EVERY TIME. Even if that amount is 2,344,338 times a day. You will also call me EVERY single time you are drunk. Do not drive. Do not get into a car with anyone else. I do not care if you are naked in the middle of a corn field. Call me. I'll find you and bring you home without hardly any bodily harm.

2. RAIN
If you are going to get wet. Wear your rubbers! ALWAYS. Even if you think it's just going to sprinkle a little. You never know when it will unexpectedly pour. Be prepared. If you fail to plan. Plan to be a daddy.

3. LOVE
I will always love you fiercely and that will never change. Deal with it and try to love me back. I won't tell anyone. You will always be cool.


Now, if you have a teen boy and this plan will not work. Do not tell me! I still have five years before my child becomes a teen. I want to enjoy living in the dark a little.

Poker

What?

Your Day Care Provider doesn't teach the kids poker?

Just kidding!

Landon found Tim's poker game and they honestly

had no clue what they were doing.

They were yelling "Old Maid!" and "Go Fish!"

I thought it was kinda cute and I sure

wasn't going to teach them to say "Hit me!" ;)

Sick

On a more serious note...
I got sick.
The puking, pooping, shivering, shaking, kind of sick. Hit me about 8:00 P.M. on Wed. and didn't leave until about 6:00 A.M. this morning. I feel like a train ran over me. I SINCERLY wish everyone stays healthy and NEVER gets sick!!! The only good thing to come out of it was I lost 5 pounds. Now I only have 2,309 more to go. ;)

Pet Peeves

O.k. So you know those perforated marks on your cardboard food boxes? (Your Instant Potatoes, Mac and Cheese, etc...) The ones that say "Push Here To Open." Well, I want to meet the idiot who tested those boxes! It had to have been a guy (yeah, I'm guessing it was a guy) who just happened to have a steel rod implanted inside his thumb. He probably pushed it in and said "Yeah, that's good." Then they never tested the boxes again. I think this because I have NEVER opened a box by just "Pushing Here To Open"  EVER! I have to get out my knife and hope I don't cut myself while performing surgery on the box with buns of steel. If I choose not to take that route, then I have to rip the whole top off the box forcing me to choose between using the entire box or transferring the contents to another container. (Who has time for all that nonsense?) So, once I've accomplished the feat of opening the box, band-aids in place or containers in place, I find myself wishing I had just ordered a pizza from Homers. I don't make Mac and Cheese much.

Pancakes

O.k. I thought I could give up the blog and simplify my life a little. Turns out I really miss it. I can't transfer pictures to my computer because my camera broke. I bought an adapter. The adapter broke. So, since I can't post pictures, I thought I would just post random thoughts and happenings. Maybe post a picture here and there. (If I ever get my camera working right.)
Something funny happened last night. I asked Tim if he would make some pancakes for supper while I ran to the store. I came home with the groceries and there were no pancakes. Tim and Landon were playing Wii. Yeah, I was doing a slow burn...So, like the good mom/wife I am, I started making pancakes. Landon walked into the kitchen as I was flipping them. I got distracted and dropped one on the floor. I threw it on a plate. Landon asked me what I was going to do with it. I said "Give it to dad." (yeah, it was hard not to smile) So as Tim was taking the last bite of his pancake Landon said "OMG Dad! MomdroppedthatontheflooritwassodirtyprobablyhadcathairinittooandyouateitwowdadIcan'tbelieveyouateit!"
I had to run to the bathroom to keep from snorting pancakes out my nose, I was laughing so hard.
Busted.
For the record, Tim said he was going to "Get me back." Whatever. :)