We're Not In Kansas, But It Feels Like It

A freaky thing happened to me last night. I was on my way to Sissiton to put on a purse show for a family cousin, Josie. I took Hyw. 27 to Browns Valley, hung a right and when I got around that first bend, (Don't cha just love small town road talk? And ya know exactly where I was at, don't cha?) the wind just started whipping big time!! I mean BIG TIME! I could hardly keep my van on the road! Talk about white knuckles. I kept looking up at the sky to see if there were any funnel clouds. (Tornado's for the Southern folks) Didn't see a thing. I pulled into that gas station by the casino to get a bottle of pop and collect my nerves, and as I opened the van door, the wind whipped that baby wide open. I mean WIDE open! It made a huge "CRACK!" sound and it was sticking straight out at a horrible angle. You know how when someone breaks a leg or an arm and their limbs are pointing in the wrong direction? That's what my door was doing. I felt a little sick. As I climbed out of the van, I had to grab the door handle to keep my balance. I felt like I was going to be sucked up into the big blue sky up yonder at any second. It was insane! I couldn't get the door shut with just my hands, so I had to back my body up to it and shove it shut with all my weight. (No need to reveal that amount here.) It went, "Crack! Crack! Crack!" More queasiness. I kept praying that the door would just stay on until I made it back home later that night. I was more or less blown into the store. I thought I would hear conversations about a tornado or at least a little tunnel, but no one seemed to be concerned. Well, I was concerned! After I purchased my bottle of pop, I had to fight the wind hard to get back to my van. (Made for a lovely hair day, I tell ya.) I got in the passenger side and crawled over to the driver's seat and headed to the party. At the party, I mentioned to one of our aunts, and a few ladies that were sitting there, that the wind had grabbed my door and broke it. No one seemed concerned. No one asked what happened or if I was all right. One of them casually commented that, "Yeah, it can get pretty windy around here." Well, if that is a normal weather occurrence, then let me tell ya, I never want to live in Sissiton! After the party, I kind of forgot about the door (it was a long day and night!) and opened it. No, it didn't fall off, but it would only open a little bit. I had to squeeze, and I mean SQUEEZE, through the space to get in. On the way home, I had to drive 40 MPH. Between the wind (It was still whipping!) and the deer, (They were all over the place and kept jumping out onto the road every mile or so! What's up with that???) I didn't dare drive any faster and it took FOREVER! When I finally got home, (It was soooo good to be home, and in one piece!) it was late and Tim was already asleep. I woke him up anyway. Yeah, I did. I had to tell him about the tornado I was in. (I don't believe for one minute that it was just a "little wind" that ripped that door practically off! Not one minute.) After I told him my story, he said..."Yeah....o.k..... I'll check it out in the morning." Say what? O.k. Fine. Whatever. But, don't come crying to me when something blows your tighty whitey's up. Just saying. I think I might need to find me a pair of red heels. Click. Click. There's no place like home.....I'll be ready next time!